A viewer brought to my attention a confession video to the internet by a woman with an eating disorder called orthorexia nervosa. Orthorexia is an eating disorder that involves being overly obsessed with healthy eating, to the point where health declines. This person obsesses over eating the perfect foods and has to adjust their lifestyle so that they can always maintain their diet.
Steven Bratman, MD coined this disorder and has described its distinct features from anorexia nervosa. Although patients may have extremely low body weight, similar to anorexia, it’s their intention that distinctly categorizes them. Often, orthorexics wish to eat “pure” foods. And this was the case with Fully Raw Kristina, the 32-year old female virgin.
The cognitive dissonance isn’t difficult to understand. Too much of anything is a bad thing, and promoting virginity into old age isn’t healthy, as the benefit of virginity ultimately was to create healthy families. This is obviously a superior outcome to Kristina’s, where she is single, has no family, and is grappling with a lonely reality.
In the video above, I cite examples where Kristina seems happy, but isn’t. She tells herself “this is a beautiful thing, I’m in a flower garden in Bali,” to convince herself that she isn’t sad. She explains that once upon a time, someone broke her heart. It was her third “love interest.” She doesn’t even call it a relationship. They hung out every day, but he left her and was with someone else while with her. She was unable to recover, which is strange because many women have experienced this same exact thing and have still recovered (eating disorders and in general, weakness from malnutrition will make it harder to recover from anything).
What Kristina fails to do is point the finger at herself. Her strange diet and lifestyle, with her quest to save sex until marriage (which she describes as a ‘gift’–can you imagine a man describing having sex with him as a gift?) is ultimately what drove that man away. He didn’t like her. Instead of understanding why, she claims to be protecting herself.
Whatever rationale she comes up with, it’s incorrect, because sex does not follow reason. Many women commented under that video that they wish they had saved sex until marriage, because apparently things did not work out. Unfortunately, you cannot “wish” these things, as you will be driven by your desires, if you are healthy.
Kristina is not healthy. Members of the raw food diet cult, which I used to be part of, believe that amenorrhea, or the loss of your period, is a sign that you have finished “detoxifying” the body. These harmful beliefs help members maintain a diet that causes malnutrition, emaciation, cognitive decline, and of course, a lack of libido.
Kristina describes sexuality from an aloof standpoint, and suggests she still “hugs” other people, which apparently proves that she is not “prude.” Her aloofness from sex is more evidence to me, especially having been on the diet for 13 months (compared to her 12 years) that her sex drive has been absent for such a long time, she cannot even conceive of sexual desire with a man.
No man wants to be with this woman, or thinks that having sex with her is some kind of ‘gift.’ At 32, the age is showing, and she is not youthful or attractive anymore. This may explain why she is so sad in the video, and rambles on about protecting herself. Again, the logic cannot work as these desires do not come from the mind, but the body and heart.
More women should probably save sex for marriage because it improves the probability of having a successful one. Women however should not remain virgins because their reproductive system isn’t functioning, because in that case, no one wants to have sex with them anyway. Healthy virginity is the former example and involves a robust young woman in her mid-to-late teens* or early twenties who has a high sex drive but needs the care and affection of a good man and a strong leader. Unhealthy virginity is a woman who is dried up like a prune, ravaged by the stresses of life, and cannot reproduce, and therefore has zero value.
*The CDC has been collecting birth data in women from 15-44 since 1940 (see here and here) The notion that a woman in her mid-teens cannot have sex or give birth is flawed. Suggesting this basic fact does not endorse pedophilia or having sex with women in their mid-teens. Always consult with Google.com to understand the consent laws in your state.